His expression didn’t relax at all. There was something odd in his eyes, a strange emotion she couldn’t read. “What are calf eyes?” he asked.
She smiled. “I’m not sure either, so if I don’t know, I can’t make them, or do them, or whatever.” She turned serious. “I’m not going to be a problem.”
“I never thought you would be.” He leaned toward her. “I want you to feel free to date. You still have time off in the evening and if you’re giving up Joel, there’s no reason to wait to ‘discover the world’ as you put it.”
She didn’t mind him not sharing her fantasy, but she deeply resented that he was so quick to throw her into the path of other men. “Gee, thanks,” she said. “I think I’ll wait at least a couple of days to get used to being single again. It’s been a long time.” She rose to her feet. “It’s getting late. I’m going up to bed.”
She crossed to the door, then paused and looked back at him. “Thanks for everything, Ryan. For reasons that probably don’t make sense to you, I’m very grateful for what you did.”
He stood, too. He was tall and broad and she found herself wishing she was standing a little closer to him.
“You make it sound like a big favor,” he said. “Kissing you was my pleasure.” He flashed her a quick smile. “I mean that.”
She told herself to turn away, but she couldn’t. If only he would walk over and kiss her again, she thought. Maybe even do more than kiss. But he wasn’t going to. She thanked him again and left. At least she would have the memory of their kiss…not to mention all the fantasies about what it would be like if they were to start that fire between them again.
CHAPTER TWELVE
THE NEXT WEEK was uneventful, for which Cassie was grateful. There had been enough trauma and change in her life for any month. Not that she would have objected to Ryan showing up unexpectedly in her bedroom, swearing undying devotion and then making passionate love to her for hours. But if she couldn’t have that, peace and quiet were a very nice substitute.
Their routine continued, with Sasha in preschool Monday through Thursday morning. Ryan joined them for meals and spent his early evenings with his niece as well. Cassie wanted to believe that her witty company was what drew him, but she knew better. When it was time for Sasha to go to bed, he either took over the duties or let her handle them and disappeared into his office. Either way, once Sasha was down for the night, Ryan left Cassie alone.
“We can’t have everything,” she said aloud, as she slipped her jacket off its hanger and put it on. They were going shoe shopping for Sasha. In the space of a few days, the toddler’s favorite shoes had gotten too tight. Visiting the mall would be a nice change, and for reasons Cassie didn’t quite understand, Ryan had agreed to go with them.
She crossed to her dresser and ran a brush through her short hair. She used her left hand to push a wayward strand in place, and as she did so, she glanced at the place where her promise ring used to be. Joel was well and truly out of her life.
She’d thought he might call her. After all, his idea had been that with a little time she would come to her senses. But he hadn’t tried to contact her at all. Cassie carefully probed her heart, searching for any signs of hurt or remorse. The only negative emotion there was sadness that something that had lasted so long could be forgotten so easily. She still wasn’t sorry that she’d ended things between them. Her only feeling was one of relief and a nagging sense that she should have done this a long time ago.
If there was any regret, it was that this might be causing him pain. She hoped not. Their relationship had been comfortable for both of them, but she doubted Joel had given his heart any more than she had. A smile tugged at the corner of her mouth. All he needed was a hot date with a gorgeous blonde and he would forget all about her, she thought. If only she knew one who was interested in him.
“Cassie, are you about ready?” Ryan called from downstairs.
At the sound of his voice, her heart rate increased. “I’m on my way,” she yelled as she hurried from her bedroom and headed for the stairs.
If Ryan could make her heart race with just the sound of his voice, imagine what would happen if they ever did the naked thing, she thought humorously. Not that they ever would, but a girl could dream. And dream she did. Nothing like having a handsome, single, charming man living under the same roof to give her a little inspiration.
She grabbed her purse and stepped outside. Ryan and Sasha stood by his late model BMW 540i. “I installed the car seat,” he said as she approached.